Comic Review: Doom Patrol #1

Sweet Umata Kalabra, how do I explain any of this? The "Worlds Strangest Heroes" have always been on the fringe but we rarely get a close up of those tassels. I feel as if I should review this Rebirth with the same ADHD, scatter-shot narrative that this book gives the reader. It would be fun to write but nobody would get it and few would enjoy reading it.

GLOB IT, I'll try. I'd warn you for spoilers, but I'm not sure that's possible with this book.

Now without exploding flies.

Casey Brinke drives an ambulance. She goes fast and always stays super positive and her partner is awesome too in a kinda, sorta, zen my wife left me for a cult sorta way. He's great at saving lives and there is prolly more too him than that but we don't have time for that now cause there is an emergency and never mind the fly blowing up a gyro.

Jerk-Sauce is my new catch phrase.

Machine man was battling some people somewhere and blew up everything and fell to earth and Casey is an ambulance driver, so hey, why not help him. Too bad he got hit by a garbage truck. 

This is where Arby's get's their meat from... all makes sense now.

Ricardo is throwing bricks in an abandoned building. Danny is missing. How will we ever stop the intergalactic fast-food franchises from harvesting sentient non-stressed meat ?

It's about to get smooth jazz in here.

Niles Caulder seems to be a DJ now, but he has a fly (the insect) button that he presses. Pretty sure gyro related, but not positive. Any-who, Casey gets a singing birthday telegram from Terry None who blows up Casey's roommate, but that's okay because she will be Casey's new roommate. Terry is loaded (money wise) and interested in the parts of Machine Man that Casey has scattered around. Why not open him up and tinker.

Look who can tell a persons sex by looking at their cranium. 

The god of super-heroes has been killed with a brick.

Dammit, I just mopped.

So there you have it. Maybe? I'm not sure. Cats are cool, huh? Believe it or not, that was a whole lot more linear than the comic. 

Garard Way has crafted a story(?) that is as cooky as Grant Morrison's run on Doom Patrol, but way more schizophrenic. If this is indicative of the new "Young Animals" brand of the DC Universe then we have allot of crazy adventures in front of us. Way has managed to craft something that is only slightly comprehensible and leave me wanting the next book... That is hard to do.

The whole comic would fall apart if it were not for both the pencils (Nick Darington) and the colors (Tamra Bonvillain). The entire book is a small series of panels that have little else to do with the other, sometimes using different art styles to underline this point. Both Darington and Bonvillain should be commended for this. 

In the end, I have a hard time telling anybody to buy this comic other than the Doom Patrol fans or people board of cognitive concurrence. This comic is also NSFW, but anybody buying it would know that anyway. When the story comes together in a hardcover or a paperback it will be much more worth while and you will not have to wait till the narrative puzzle pieces are glued on to the page. I also can't really give it a bad grade because this is a good kind of weird. 

Rating 7.7/10 Shaggy Lotion Hairs